The Sweetest Burn Read online

  I sat up, and when the room seemed to tilt, that’s when I realized that my wounds might be healed, but I wasn’t all the way recovered. “That was smart, sending Brutus ahead of you. I passed out right after he got there, and I don’t know if Adrian could’ve managed to drive to you in his condition.”

  “Probably not,” Jasmine said. Then she laughed, though it sounded more choked than amused. “Guess I can’t hate Adrian anymore, considering that he took a bullet and what looked like a hell of a beating in order to get you out of that realm.”

  “I hope you do stop,” I said, holding her stare. “You don’t need to like him, but he hasn’t done anything to earn your hatred.”

  She ran a hand through the white streak in her hair. “He has by being one of them.”

  “A Judian?” I sighed. “He can’t help that any more than I can help being the last Davidian.”

  “Not that,” she said. “A demon. I don’t care if he is technically human, he’s just like them. They’re also totally ruthless except when it comes to whatever they care about, and if they want something, they’ll stomp over anyone and everything to get it, too.”

  It was so close to the concern I’d felt when Adrian drove away from those stranded motorists without a backward glance that I simply stared at her for a moment. Could she be right? No, I decided, shoving those fears away. She can’t be.

  “Circumstances have forced Adrian to be single-minded and ruthless. They’ve forced me to be that way sometimes, too,” I said, conviction growing as I thought about the people I’d had to leave behind in the realm. I hadn’t wanted to; I’d had no choice. Neither had Adrian, most of the time. That didn’t mean either of us were heartless to the point of resembling demons. Jasmine just didn’t understand.

  Jasmine let out a ragged breath. “Maybe I shouldn’t be judging Adrian. I’ve done awful things, too.”

  “No you haven’t,” I said at once.

  She looked away, and her shoulders started to tremble. “I—I didn’t tell you this before, but they tortured Tommy to get me to answer questions about you. I didn’t want to, but what they did to him...” Her voice cracked and tears spilled down her face. “It broke me. I told them everything. I sold you out, Ivy.”

  The pain in her voice was so raw, it tore at me. I couldn’t imagine how awful it had been for her, seeing her boyfriend tortured by the most sadistic creatures in existence. I tried to speak, to tell her that I understood, but she held up her hand almost violently.

  “Afterward, they killed Tommy anyway, and they laughed at me for believing that they’d let him live if I told them what they wanted to know. After that, I wanted to die, too, but the hate...it kept me going. It was the only thing that did, and now, if I let it go, I don’t think I’ll be able to make it,” she finished in an agonized whisper before dissolving into tears.

  “Yes, you will,” I said, taking her hands and gripping them. “You’re strong, Jasmine. So much stronger than they’ll ever be, no matter how many powers they have. And you didn’t sell me out. You didn’t know where I was or what I was doing the whole time the demons had you, so don’t feel guilty about that a moment longer.” My voice rose as I tried to force her to look at me. “And even if you had known and you told them, I would still love you. You’re my sister, and nothing will ever change that.”

  She finally looked up, and the mixture of hope and heartbreak in her gaze was painful to witness. “You mean that?”

  “Of course I do,” I said, putting all the conviction I had into my voice. “Forever.”

  Then, she did something she hadn’t done since we were kids. She threw her arms around me and cried.

  * * *

  HALF AN HOUR LATER, Jasmine used a reflective surface in the bathroom to make sure that she’d cleaned away all the evidence of her tears. I hadn’t been wearing mascara like her, so all I’d needed to do was splash some water on my face and blow my nose a few times before I was good as new.

  “I’ll try not to hate Adrian anymore,” Jaz called out from the bathroom, “but it’s a lot harder for me to believe the best about him like you do, especially when I’ve heard so much about his worst from the demons who held me captive.”

  I shuddered, glad I hadn’t heard what she had. Adrian had told me the generalities about his past, but I never wanted to know the details. “I understand, and I don’t expect miracles.” Then I let out a brief, ironic laugh. “Okay, I guess I do, but I’m reserving that for finding the staff and being able to use it.”

  She cocked her head. “Why wouldn’t you be able to use it?”

  I looked away, blaming my recent blood loss for the slip. Jasmine hadn’t seen me wield the slingshot, so she didn’t know that using it had almost killed me, and the staff was supposed to be more powerful by a lot. On my optimistic days, I gave myself a fifty-fifty chance of surviving it. Still, what could I do? Not try to stop the walls between the realms from crumbling? Even if I could live with myself if I did nothing to prevent the mass slaughter that would follow—and I couldn’t, not after what I’d seen—I wouldn’t survive the aftermath, either. So, likely death or not, the staff was the best chance I had.

  I just wasn’t able to tell Jasmine that using it would probably be the last thing I ever did. Not yet. She was still too battered emotionally to deal with that.

  Lies of omission are still lies, an inner voice seemed to taunt. Was it only last night that I’d said that to Adrian? So much had happened since then, it seemed like a long time ago. “Oh, you know,” I said, forcing a fake laugh. “Performance anxiety. I used to freak out before my chorus solos, too.”

  I couldn’t tell her the truth, even if it made me a total hypocrite. I’d rather suffer her justified anger later than hurt her more now while she was already bleeding on the inside from countless emotional wounds.

  “I remember.” Jasmine’s smile told me that she bought the lie, which was a relief. “But you were great with those, and you’ll be great with this, too. Mom and Dad—” her voice cracked “—they’d be so proud of you, Ivy.”

  I didn’t expect the tears that spilled down my cheeks as if they’d been longing to escape. I tried so hard not to openly grieve for our parents, both to be strong for Jasmine and to avoid the pain that buried me every time I allowed myself to dwell on their deaths. They had adopted me after I’d been left by a highway like so much trash. Raised me with the same love and devotion they’d shown to their biological daughter, and tried in every way to help me overcome a psychological affliction that turned out to be a supernatural destiny.

  There was no way to get over so great a loss. My only coping mechanism was to back-burner it. That’s why I forced another fake smile as I tucked my sister’s hair behind her ear.

  “They’d be proud of you, too.”

  And they’d want her to be happy. I swiped at my eyes, resolve drying my tears. If I succeeded, she’d have a chance to be, and so would Costa, Adrian and countless other people. What was a little probable death compared to that?

  “I’m going to take a shower,” I told her, scratching a hand through my hair and feeling something grainy. “If I’m not mistaken, I’ve got dried blood all over me.”

  * * *

  OUR BUS STOPPED and started during my shower, but I didn’t think much of it until I came out into the bus’s general living area, looked around and realized that someone was missing.

  “Where’s Adrian?”

  Costa was driving, and he glanced back at me with a wave. “Out getting another car since he had to leave his Challenger behind. You know this beast is too slow and cumbersome. We’ll need something with power when there’s another emergency.”

  “When?” I repeated, with a hollow little laugh. “What a glass-half-empty thought.”

  Costa gave me a sardonic grin. “You’re the only optimist on this road trip, Ivy.”

/>   Brutus was in his usual place behind the driver’s seat, a blanket covering him from head to clawed toe. As I approached, he began to wiggle in anticipation. I put my arms around him, ending up in his lap when he grabbed me. Then, with happy-sounding grunts, he began licking my face through the blanket.

  “You’re a big softie trapped in a scary gargoyle’s body,” I told him, but I didn’t mind. He must’ve snatched me and Adrian right out of the convertible, saving us from crashing in our badly injured conditions. That was well worth a few face licks.

  “Who’s the best, Brutus?” I continued, patting his huge head. He responded with a series of chuffs that were obvious translations of I am, I am! so I patted and praised him again.

  Jasmine watched with a sort of morbid fascination. “Mom and Dad should’ve let you get another puppy when we were little,” she finally muttered. “You’ve lost it, Ives.”

  “Friends come in all shapes and sizes,” I replied pertly. “And that includes two-ton, demonically altered reptiles.”

  Jasmine shook her head, but as she turned away, I caught a glimpse of a smile. Brutus had gone from terrifying her to making her wary to now garnering a smile. In time, she’d come to realize that the fearsome guard she’d seen when she was trapped in a demon realm didn’t truly represent all that Brutus was.

  Come to think of it, the same could be said for her perception of Adrian, although she’d probably accept Brutus quicker.

  After I was done praising Brutus for his rescue, I had that cup of coffee and fixed something for breakfast, or lunch since it was well past noon. Then I surprised myself by falling asleep on the couch. I hadn’t realized I was still so tired, but I must have been, because it was dark out when I woke up. I suppressed my instant shudder at seeing blackness pressed against the windows as if it were a malevolent force trying to get in. It felt too soon since the last time the darkness I saw had been a real, living thing that had tried to kill me.

  “Don’t worry, we’re on hallowed ground.”

  Adrian’s voice came from the back of the bus, then he emerged from the bathroom still towel drying his hair. I didn’t know how he’d known that I’d woken up, or how he’d known about the instant dread that had overtaken me at the darkness outside, but his words calmed me. So did seeing him without any bullet holes, blood or bluish-tinged skin. I got up and went to him, and he enfolded me in a hug that seemed to whisper promises to my soul that I gladly drank in.

  “Um.” My sister cleared her throat, and that’s the first I realized that she was nearby, too. “I’d say get a room, but with one so close, I’m afraid that you might actually do it.”

  I turned, seeing her sitting in the passenger seat despite the bus being parked. “Was that a joke?” I asked in wonder.

  She flashed me a small smile. “I hope so.”

  I laughed, letting go of Adrian rather reluctantly. “Even if I was tempted into letting him slide from his promise to prove that he won’t betray me, he swears that he won’t do it.”

  Adrian arched a brow at Jasmine as if to say, Bet you didn’t expect that. From her expression, he was right.

  “Did I miss anything?” Costa said, coming inside the bus.

  “Nothing you want to know about,” Jasmine muttered.

  Now that everyone was here, I wanted to update them on the most significant thing that had happened during our escape from the realm. “I have something to tell you that should make you feel better.” I cleared my throat. “I, um, think I killed Demetrius.”

  Saying the words made me both happy and fearful. I wanted to celebrate, and at the same time, I was half-afraid that the demon would magically show up to prove me wrong.

  Jasmine’s eyes widened. “Really?”

  “Isn’t he already dead?” was Costa’s surprised question.

  Adrian made a low, vicious sound. “He survived what happened in Bennington, and while I hope Ivy’s right, I won’t believe he’s truly dead until I dance in his ashes.”

  “But how could you kill him?” Costa looked confused. “The sling’s gone, and I thought that only Archons can kill demons.”

  I held up my arm. “Turns out, the slingshot isn’t gone. It’s just dormant until a demon gets close. Then it turns back into the real thing, except it only kills them one at a time.”

  Jasmine and Costa stared at the markings in disbelief. Adrian laid his hand over the tattoo, smiling a bit grimly.

  “She’s telling the truth, and I’d have the burn marks to prove it, if you hadn’t stuffed me full of manna last night.”

  “It burns me, too,” I said, with a hollow laugh. “I just don’t get any visible welts. At least it doesn’t hurt as much as it did the first time I used it.”

  Adrian glanced back and forth between me and the tattoo before meeting my eyes. “I don’t think the weapon’s potency has diminished. I think you’ve gotten stronger and better able to withstand the pain. In fact—” his expression took on a hard, assessing look “—with it, now we have something to use to build up your tolerance to the staff. A hallowed weapon is the best way to train you to withstand another hallowed weapon.”

  I didn’t like the sound of this. “How? I have to be very close to a demon to activate the slingshot, and I don’t want to risk my life hanging out with demons anytime soon.”

  The hardness in Adrian’s expression didn’t lessen even as a slight smile curled his lips.

  “I might know a way around that.”

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  I FELT A PANG of nostalgia as I looked around the campus of Marquette University in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. If my life had turned out differently, I’d be close to finishing my junior year at the College of William and Mary. Jasmine would be wrapping up her freshman year there, and our parents would be looking forward to having both of us home for the summer.

  Instead, we were orphaned dropouts who were sneaking onto campus with a gargoyle disguised as a seagull, a former demon-realm captive and the last descendant of Judas. No wonder there were moments when part of me thought that this was just one long, extremely strange dream. Yet here we were, and somewhere on this campus was the place that Adrian apparently called home. He didn’t live here as a student, of course. In fact, according to him, no one knew that he lived here at all.

  I had felt the thrum of hallowed ground as soon as we stepped onto the campus. Since this was a Catholic and Jesuit school, that explained why. There were more than a few churches on-site, but I noticed that the supernatural vibrations grew the closer we came to our destination. By the time we reached St. Joan’s Chapel, my nerves felt like they’d been transformed into guitar strings during a concert.

  With its medieval architecture, the small stone chapel looked like it belonged next to the ruins of a castle on a lonely European hill. Not surrounded by multistoried lecture halls on the grounds of a modern American university. Evening mass had just ended, judging by the people spilling out of the chapel. I smiled at them as we walked up the stone steps, ignoring the many curious glances aimed at Brutus. If they thought that a seagull tottering behind us looked strange, they’d really freak out if they could see Brutus’s true form.

  “I still don’t think this is a good idea,” Costa muttered.

  From her expression, Jasmine agreed, but she stayed silent. Adrian gave them a quick, measuring look before replying.

  “Once again, anyone who wants to can stay back at the bus.”

  “As soon as I make sure that Ivy’s really safe, I’m out of here,” Jasmine said briskly. “Until then, I’m staying.”

  This time, Adrian’s silvery-blue eyes lingered on me. “I’m not saying it’ll be easy, but it should be as safe as regular target practice.”

  “Sure, if you ignore the part about the target being a living, bloodthirsty demon,” Jasmine said under her breath.

 
I had to admit, that had given me pause the first time Adrian had told me his plan, but I knew as well as he did how important it was to train for the staff. Jasmine didn’t, so she’d reacted as though Adrian were trying to fulfill his destiny by betraying me. By the time she’d calmed down enough to hear him explain the safeguards, we were halfway to Milwaukee.

  Now that the moment had arrived, however, I felt more than a little nervous. Not because I thought that Adrian was about to pull a Judas, but because I was dreading the pain to come. As we walked into the chapel, my right arm began to tingle as if the sling was beginning to wake up. Made sense; according to Adrian, the demon was about thirty feet below where we were standing.

  The interior of the chapel wasn’t heavily decorated, but what was there was beautiful. Wooden chairs contrasted with the ancient stone walls and stained glass window mosaics. The ceiling was surprisingly low and flat until it neared the altar, and then it arced upward a full story and became shaped like an octagon that had been cut in half. The chapel was now empty of students, but a priest in full vestments stopped Adrian when he started to go behind the carved altar.

  “My son, what are you—?”

  “It’s Adrian, Father Louis,” he interrupted him, smiling wryly.

  “Adrian!” the priest said with obvious happiness. “What an impressive new disguise. I’m so glad to see you. It’s been so long, I was beginning to grow worried.”

  “This is no disguise. For once, you’re seeing the real me, and as for being away,” Adrian replied, reaching out to draw me forward, “you’ll understand once you meet the reason why. Ivy, this is Father Louis. Zach brought me to him when I was fresh out of the realms, and he took me in and gave me a crash course on humanity. Father Louis, this is Ivy.”

  I said hello and shook hands with Father Louis, but when it came time to let go, the priest didn’t. Instead, the white-haired father began to tremble as he stared at the tattoo snaking from my finger to my forearm.

  “Adrian,” he whispered. “Is it... Is—is she...?” He seemed too shocked to finish the sentence, so Adrian did.